Bachmann's Husband

During this time of wondering if the 535 fork-and-spoon operators that make up the U.S. Congress are about to destroy what's left of the world economy, there's one question on everyone's mind--is Michele Bachmann's husband gay?

The presidential candidate's husband, Marcus, is particularly controversial because his profession is providing psychological counselling to turn gay people straight. See, gay people apparently have some sort of psychological disorder that makes them sexually desire their own gender, and moreover, this is a terrible thing so Marcus Bachmann had dedicated his working life to help get the gay out of people.

As it happens, Marcus Bachmann also now stands accused of being gay himself, since he's set off people's "gaydar". What is this, you ask? Apparently, people can be deemed gay due to how they walk, talk, and generally carry themselves--which to be fair is about as scientific as Bachmann's anti-gay therapy. Those who cheer this simply because they are offended by Bachmann are not helping matters--do we really want to give credence to this idea that effeminacy has a direct link to homosexuality? I don't really see how the gay acceptance movement gets anywhere by lending weight to mocking stereotypes--even if used against this guy. I imagine some closeted homosexuals around the country seeing this guy being mocked for how he walks and talks are probably cringing.

And moreover, what should it matter if Bachmann is gay? If he actually is a closeted homosexual, then I just feel sorry for him--imagine having to stomp down your inner feelings because you're in an environment where such feelings are considered sinful and deviant, in need of "fixing". And if Bachmann was more a John Wayne type (or Rock Hudson, if you will), would that make his destructive "therapy" any more credible? It's not the hypocrisy that makes such beliefs wrong, it's the beliefs themselves.

As someone who wants to become the most powerful person on earth, Michele Bachmann should be called to task on her and her husband's beliefs regarding a not insignificant number of Americans. But a tactic that seems a little too close to gay-bashing isn't the way to do it.