1) Ex Special Forces tough guy down on his luck rooms with poor family where he befriends the youngest son who is being bullied at school. The tough guy teaches the boy how to defend himself, with hilarious results as the kid gets pummelled harder. The tough guy then beats up the bully himself because this is what the audience always wanted to see. Oh, and he has sex with the young boy's mother.
2) A ragtag platoon gets stranded behind enemy lines after a battle, and they soon realize they all come from very different backgrounds and have clashing personalities. They fight with each other the whole time, even resulting in physical blows. Finally they give themselves up to the enemy in the hopes that they'll be sent to different POW camps. Hilariously, the enemy decides to force them to live together at the camp, and do projects together as a group. In the end they realize that this sucks, and when they finally get released in a POW exchange, they promise to never deal with each other again.
3) A smooth-talking lothario with the ladies sets his sights on an ambitious career woman who has no time for love. Soon, he realizes she's too difficult and probably not worth it, so he dates her assistant who is a lot more easy going. The career woman then gets jealous, fires the assistant, and the rest of the film is a courtroom drama between the assistant's lawyers and the company lawyers over the employment discrimination claims.
4) A serial killer stalks a group of busty coeds at a remote cabin in the woods. However, he's a serial killer, not a skilled outdoorsman, and quickly succumbs to frostbite and a bad case of poison oak, and one of the coeds finds him half dead near the cabin and takes him in. Turns out, she's a nurse, and one of the other coeds is a psychiatrist, and they both cure his frostbite and get him on the right medication. With the support of his new friends, the serial killer goes back to college to finish his degree and win a Rhodes Scholarship, in an ending that will be both heartwarming and life affirming.
5) A down on his luck gambler ends up owing $20K to a dangerous mobster, so he shoots the mobster and leaves town. The rest of the mob decides they have better things to do than worry over $20K, and they never liked the dead mobster anyway and were glad to not have to give him a cut of their profits on gambling, so they drop the issue. The gambler checks into rehab to fix his gambling problem, and meets a great looking therapist who has an insensitive husband. While he has an opportunity to carry on an affair with her, he opts not to, since he already dodged a close bullet with the mob and doesn't want to push his luck. He stays satisfied with his platonic friendship, knowing he's likely to meet a great woman who happens to be unattached someday.