1) I want to see a reality show called "Making Friends" where the contestants are judged at how well they can make friends with others. Then when they interview the "sassy" contestant who says "hey, I'm not here to make friends!" the producer can point out that that's exactly what they're here to do.
2) If you watch enough comedies without laugh tracks, you start to find comedies with laugh tracks creepy. Particularly when you realize that the laughter on the track was taken from recordings from the 1950s and much of that laughter comes from dead people.
3) It used to be impressive for someone to say they have seen every single episode of a particular TV series. Now it just means they have a Netflix account and had a very rainy Sunday.
4) Every time there's been a scandal, the media adds "-gate" after the relevant word to compare it to Watergate ("Travelgate", "Irangate", "Whitewatergate"). Why don't they do this with other media narratives? Any war that is starting to look like Vietnam could have "-nam" added after it. I'm afraid Afghansitan-nam could be trouble for the president!
5) Whenever liberals or conservatives complain that "all the stupid people are voting for" the other party, it seems they're just jealous that they weren't able to trick the stupid people as well as the other side was. Better luck next time, jerks! Try to fit your philosophy more on a bumper sticker.
6) Yesterday I saw an "Obama '08" bumper sticker on a guy's car. Hey buddy, they have new stickers out, you know! Quit living in the past!
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