Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Tuesday Thoughts

1) Adding the word "salad" to something doesn't make it healthy. Otherwise, "fried chocolate salad" would be a great loophole for any diet.

2) Yes I will try and fry chocolate. Welcome to Coronary Country.

3) There is some inborn human instinct that requires us to speed up to go around any bus, truck or postal vehicle when one is ahead of us on the road. This is true even when the other vehicle is driving along at a good clip and not doing anything dangerous. It's as though we can picture getting smashed by one of these things and we don't trust professional drivers.

4) Considering sports team names that play on offensive ethnic stereotypes (Fighting Irish, Redskins, Vikings), an Italian-American friend and I were asked whether we'd root for a team named after an offensive Italian-American slur. We both agreed that we would, as at least that would be some recognition. We won't be up for any Image Awards any time soon.

5) If you wanted to watch music videos, you once had something called MTV. Then they decided "M" stands for "Bad Reality Shows" and the only option you had was VH1. VH1 then decided that shows mocking the '80s were what the music loving public wanted, and today the only way you can watch music videos is on youtube.com, which used to be the premier place to see guys giving each other painful groin injuries while performing stunts. I predict in ten years NBC will become a music video channel when they realize no one is watching it for anything else.

6) James Bond always goes around without a disguise and literally introducing himself as "James Bond". This guy is a secret agent? With the bounties on his head from supervillains and jealous husbands alike, isn't he concerned some low-level flunky is just going to take a shot at him anytime he goes out in public?

7) Older generations used to look at the youth and say "you don't know how good you have it" and "you ingrates, you'll be driving much nicer cars and have cooler toys". We might be the first generation that looks at the youth and says "you're screwed. Sorry!"

8) The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms was probably originally set up as "The Bureau to Keep An Eye on Cousin Enos".

9) I'd have no problem with a rich guy paying an extra $100 to get a DMV employee to do their licensing after hours so they don't have to wait on line with the hoi polloi. After all, the DMV employee is compensated for their time, the rich guy gets no-wait service, and us hoi polloi have one less person waiting on line with us. Why isn't this permissible?

10) Same thing about organ sales.

1 comment:

  1. Re: No. 8: Don't forget about the E in their name. Cause what fun are Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms if you don't have the Explosives to go with them? Not much in my book.