Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Greatest American City, Round Five!

There's been a lot of regional acrimony over which city will eventually win the Greatest City in America Tournament. It's a little-known fact that a dispute back in the 1861 tournament between Charleston, South Carolina and Boston, Massachusetts led to the respective states going to war and bringing their fellow states in with them. Such disputes are impossible in this modern day of civility and intelligent debate.

Today's matchup--Philadelphia, Pennsylvania versus Atlanta, Georgia!

1) Philly has a good deal of history, being the place that the Declaration of Independence was signed, and where Rocky ran up a flight of steps. Atlanta on the other hand was razed to the ground by cruel General Sherman, and to my knowledge Rocky never even visited the city. Sadness, and points for Philly.

2) Philly has the cheesesteak. Unfortunately, they often put squeeze cheese on it, which is just nasty. Points for Atlanta, yech!

3) Atlanta was originally named Marthasville, and then Terminus, and finally got its name from the Ocean on which it sits. Except that it's pretty far inland. Oops! Philadelphia on the other hand has not been named after anyone named Philip, or Delph. So what we have is a couple of liars! Push!

4) Philly is host to the great TV show, "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia." Atlanta, however, was host of "Designing Women." So take that, er, um, oh . . . points for Philly.

5) Atlanta was where Hank Aaron broke Babe Ruth's lifetime home run record, and also hosted the '96 Olympics. Philadelphia, on the other hand, was where Eagles fans tossed snowballs at Santa Claus. What the hell, Philly???? Points for Atlanta!

6) Atlanta is the capital of its state, and the largest city and cultural center of the Deep South. Philly is the most desirable city in its region, unless you're able to get into NYC or Washington easily. But, Philly also has a lot of Jersey commuters, so . . . hmm. Atlanta with more points.

Looks like an upset win for Atlanta, which is a bit odd since I generally prefer visiting Philly for its good restaurants, walkable neighborhoods, and easy proximity to DC. Unfortunately I hadn't thought of those elements in making point scores. Who designs these contests, anyway?

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