Friday, August 3, 2012

Friday Thoughts

1) I have about the same feelings about three different types of wings.  That is, that wings are good, but not great.  The three types of wings I'm referring to are the '70s rock band "Wings", the '90s TV show "Wings", and the longtime pub food staple, buffalo-style wings.  I can't get excited about any of these "wings", but they're okay.

2) Whenever someone disagrees with me on a political issue, I mistakenly assume that they're crazy until I hear what they have to say for themselves.  Then I realize they're actually just stupid.

3) I can usually avoid letting another car cut in front of me in traffic so long as I avoid eye contact.  Because once they're looking pleadingly in my eyes, I just can't bear to say "screw you, wait your turn!"  A lot of the world's troubles can be avoided if there's more eye contact.

4) I suppose if you disagree with me that the world's troubles can be avoided with more eye contact, it might not be because you're crazy or stupid.  It might be because you are wall-eyed.

5) The only reason that "Skeet Archery"--whereby the archer tries to pierce an arrow through a thrown football--is not an Olympic event is because no one has tried to make this happen yet.  I'm convinced it will be a big thing in my lifetime.  If not, I doubt anyone will dig up this post and hold it in my face at my deathbed.  (If someone does do that, then I need new friends).

6) Why is it that women and gay men try to convince straight men that certain female celebrities are attractive when no straight man seems to agree?  You really never see the equivalent, where straight men and lesbians try to convince women that certain guys are absolutely great looking and they should appreciate it.

7) The ratio of people who say that they like jazz music to the people who actually listen to jazz music is about the same as the ratio of people who say they've spoken truth to power to the people who actually have spoken truth to power.

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