Monday, June 15, 2009


A friend recently complained that her boyfriend has a habit of farting in front of the fan in their bedroom which--being upwind--carries the odor to her in a tactical maneuver akin to something truly Napoleonic. He then uses guile and trickery to blame the cat, which is a move of supreme brilliance and cleverness until you realize they don't have a cat. I'm trying to come up with a slang term for this--passing gas and blaming it on someone or something else--and so far can only come up with "fartgoating" (farting plus scapegoating).

There are many schools of thought on the issue of fart etiquette, particularly when in a relationship--one couple I know (I won't name names here! They read this blog) is perfectly comfortable blasting one out in front of one another, or trying to do the dreaded "Dutch Oven" when in bed (where you let one go, then cover your partner's head with the blanket so they get a good whiff). Another friend of mine claims you should never pass gas in front of anyone, ever. Ever. I think that's also sort of extreme.

Proper fart etiquette? Avoid it when you can in front of others (and especially those you want to remain attracted to you! Unless they're into that sort of thing). But if you spend enough time around someone, it's going to happen sooner or later--just make sure it's in a ventillated place!


  1. I cannot believe YOU of all people are blogging about fart etiquette! Clearly you're "try not to do it in front of others" doesn't apply to blood relatives!

  2. Hey, I said "try"...that's not a guarantee of success!

  3. Larting? Lying about a fart? Blarting? (Blaming a fart on someone/something else?)