May 5th is that magical day that comes only once a year (or twice a year, if you use a faulty French calendar--true fact, the French call "May" "Le May"), and is widely celebrated in Mexican themed bars across the country (the U.S., not Mexico--in Mexico they call today "Wednesday". Yes, they speak only English in Mexico. But the liberal media won't tell you that!). Did you know that Cinco de Mayo (as American frat boys call it) was invented in 1976 by the Coors Brewing Company to sell beer during the post-St. Patrick's Day slow period?
According to legend (or Coors executives, at least), May 5th was the date that a French army was defeated at the Battle of Pueblo by Mexican forces in the 1860s. We Americans were too busy fighting each other to get involved, or else we surely would have invaded France. (The Germans would take care of that a few years later, though). The Mexicans were proud that just like the Romans, Moors, Spaniards, English, Prussians, Haitians, Russians, Austrians, and Swiss before them, they got a chance to beat the French in battle. Therefore, Americans will celebrate the holiday for them. Or some reason.
Of course, my friends each year found a way to beat the crowds, by celebrating Cinco de Patrick, which means spending March 17th at a Mexican establishment with margaritas and tacos, and spending May 5th at an Irish bar with Guinness and stew. It is fairly certain that the Irish bars in town will be largely deserted, and their staffs will be more than happy to serve some Cinco de Patrick revellers. It's what those brave Coors executives would have wanted.
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